Dakimakura
by Joanie Dark
Summary: Kanaya practices stripping a girl with a body pillow.


Kanaya flushed green at the thought of what she was doing. It was inappropriate on so many levels—the imminent danger to all their lives should have taken precedence, she had duties to attend to, the girl she felt flushed for was an _alien_ for goodness sake. Still, she found herself standing in her respiteblock with this large plush…thing in front of her.

The "body pillow," as her research indicated it was called, was a bizarre thing. She couldn't understand the comfort humans would attain from the pillow. Yes, it was soft and cuddly, she supposed. It was certainly huggable. But it seemed as if the thing would make one's recuperacoon so_crowded_ if one slept with it as they were meant to!

She blushed, remembering the double entendre she discovered in her research. Yes, the phrase "sleeping with" it its secondary connotation would translate well to her use of the pillow, currently in clothing resembling the garb of her dear Seer.

She ran a hand down the pillow's "hip" over its skirt, biting her lip. This entire concept of the ways in which humans pailed with their partners was so terribly odd, but she had come to the conclusion that were she to profess her flushed feelings for the girl should they meet, she should have the decency of learning their proper methods of mating.

Goodness, that was quite the thought to have for a girl she'd never met.

Still, she had to admit she was mildly entranced by the idea. No, mildly was the wrong word. As much of an impropriety as it may have been, she couldn't help but want to have beautiful little pity-grubs with the strange pink-skinned girl.

_Right, Maryam. That is enough hesitation,_ she thought to herself, strengthening her resolve. _It you're nervous now, imagine how terrible it will be when you meet Rose._ Closing her eyes, she called to mind all her literary adventures.

_Now._

_Be the rainbow drinker._

Kanaya swept the pillow into her arms, dipping it dramatically. "Oh, my darling being of light," she said, her voice taking on the most hideous attempt at a seductive accent, "let us indulge in the most carnal of desires, unfitting of maidens such as ourselves.

Oh yes. This was it, you were the hero who deflowered the blushing young virgin protagonist. All of your trashy romance novels were coming to life. Sort of.

Pushing the pillow into the wall, firmly but not hard enough to cause harm to the "girl", was relatively easy. So was one-handedly removing the cotton jersey tee from the figure, though there was uncomfortable shuffling as she attempted to keep an arm wrapped around its "waist" and her mouth against the place Rose's lips would be. So far, so good.

Pressing a thigh into the pillow, dragging the skirt up with it somewhat, she found herself confronted with the bizarre halter that female humans apparently used to hold in the pads of fat upon their chest. A strange thing indeed, both the nature of human anatomy and the lengths gone through in order to shape them into a presentable form. Nonetheless, she had created something in resemblance of one of the cloth and wire devices, and was now quite intent on figuring out the most erotic possible way to remove it.

Apparently the animalistic approach of using one's teeth was considered arousing by many humans, she had discovered, and so she made her first attempt. She lowered her mouth to the front closure, envisioning a quick click and a seductive grin up to her partner, who would be rightfully wooed by her sexual prowess. Instead, she received a clinking metallic sound and sharp pain through her fangs, the little latch still firmly in place. Ow. Well, that was no good.

She tried again, more gingerly this time, hoping she'd have more precision. Her attempts were, sadly, just as unsuccessful, no matter how hard she worked to move her teeth and tongue in precisely the correct manner to remove the pin from the barrel. Miserable, beastly fastener.

She resigned to using her hands to undo the fiddly thing eventually, still having more trouble than she'd like to admit.

Bras were stupid, stupid things.

_Right. So. Half naked girl. Pillow. Whatever._

__You are a _terrible_ romantic rainbow drinker.__

She tried to push the thought from her mind. That sort of attitude would get her nowhere.

On to the skirt. Normally she would have simply hitched it to the girl's waist—any sort of romance to the act was a foreign concept to troll reproduction, and literature of the day walking-romance variety was more intent on the pleasures of drinking blood—but the general understanding she received from her research was that potential human matesprits had more tenderness to their interactions of a sensual manner.

_So. Moving and stripping a girl in an act of intimacy. You can do this, Kanaya._

Picking up the pillow gently, she moved it to the remnants pile, and proceeded to accidentally drop the girl among scraps of velvet and silk. Oops. That was something she should avoid in the future, she thought. It was sure _not_ to impress a girl.

She tried again, laying the thing down gently. Better, better. Sliding a hand down its "body," she hooked her thumbs in the waistband and tugged it down.

_Excellent._

_All that was left were those underpants._

_This, _this_ was an easy job for teeth, she thought._

Everything was going _so well_ the first time Kanaya and Rose hooked up. So so well, oh gog, there were no words to describe it.

Until she got to _the easiest part._

"Kanaya. Really. Stop struggling so much," Rose sighed, looking down at the roll grunting between her legs. "If you didn't account for the fact they needed to be pulled off of _two legs,_ stop trying."


End file.
